"Struggling With Being Content"

Philippians 4:11 "Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content." It's hard to admit, but I have struggled with being content this week. My heart has wanted to be at camp all week with the youth and I have even tried a few times to figure out a way to get there. Every summer I struggle leaving Tony at home while I go off on our youth trips and now that I have an opportunity to spend time with him during the summer, I'm struggling with being content. It has nothing to do with Tony. I love him so much and I am so grateful for his love for me and that he cherishes me. He gave me permission to go to camp as long as I could find someone to go with me. I had asked a few people and nothing worked out, so I decided it wasn't meant for me to be there. Then here comes the word "but"..... I want to be there so badly and I feel Satan has attacked my thoughts this week and had me to doubt the decision of staying home.

I was given a massage gift card and thought it would be nice to treat myself this week. One thing I never thought about, you need your doctor's permission to have a massage when going through chemo. I wouldn't have known that if I hadn't mentioned to the lady making my appointment that I needed someone to give me a massage that wouldn't be afraid of a lady that was bald. That's when I discovered that massages and chemo are not always the best thing together. I will have to wait until Tuesday's blood work and ask the doctor if it is okay to go ahead and have the massage.

Back to the verse for me today, I need to learn to be content in whatever situation I am in. Humanly speaking, sometimes that is so hard to do. I feel like a lot of my time has been wasted this week thinking about the things I couldn't do verses the things I am so blessed to do. Satan will use any kind of tactic to keep our focus on ourselves and to have pity parties. The God I serve is far more greater and wants the best for my life. To have true joy in my heart even when I don't get my way. I am thankful for His great love and faithfulness to me even when I want to choose to be unfaithful to Him.

I clicked over to Facebook while writing this blog and found a quote from a friend, Cari Trotter, quoting Christy Nockels saying "In my ordinary, mundane days I choose to invite the Glorious. He's an extraordinary God and I can choose to praise Him in this moment of my life."
I am thankful He gave me these words today and I don't want to miss out on God's best for my life. Even when life doesn't seem exciting and fulfilling, God can still show up and use us. If you want to hear the song that came from these words Christy Nockels wrote, highlight, right click and open the link in a new tab.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bN2zaMO8OK4

"Today is the day the Lord has made, I will rejoice and be glad in it."